Hands.....sometimes I remember especially poignant memories in the form of an image engraved within my mind. One of those memories was when we lost our young Megan. As they began to roll her casket out of the church, my brother, her father reached out and put his hand on the casket as it went by......his hand reaching out to touch her in the only way he could.
Recently I was visiting my Mother and Daddy in NC. Daddy has trouble remembering things and walks slowly with his walker. On my last night at home we went to a restaurant. As we were leaving I saw from behind my father trying to navigate his way out through the people near the entrance. And there behind him was my brother with his hand on Daddy's shoulder to steady him. It was the same hand and my mind went immediately back to Megan. His loving hand still offering that touch in the only way that he could.
There is another hand that reaches out to touch us, to steady us and to assure us that we are never alone. That hand holds everything that we are and everything that we could ever hope to be. That hand bares the scar of His sacrifice. That hand bares the scar of a nail.......Hands, O the power the touch of a hand holds!

To love people, to love a friend, to love a person with heart and soul is to feel their pain. It is that mystical thing, that is a God thing, that allows an individual to wrap their heart around another. When that love comes from God the time that you know someone matters little. For what is time to God? This love is an eternal thing and takes much risk. It is risky to love to the point that your own heart is broken in such a way as to lay open your soul before the All Mighty. Today as I was crying over the pain I feel for a friend, I asked God, "is there no limit or bottom to the pain we can feel on this earth that comes when we love others so much that we can feel their suffering?" In my spirit I saw the broken body of Jesus and I heard the familiar words........" Here is my body broken for you. Here is my blood shed for you." So there was my answer. And I was reminded of a "new command" that our Lord gave before He gave His life for us, "love one another as I have loved you."

Well......besides getting out and enjoying the first snow of our season, as Jon and I drove the Bob Marly (my jeep) up the trail, we also saw our first bear of the season. This sighting was on the way back from Lost Creek. Starbuck (my lab) and I walk this trail often. I do usually have a bear whistle with me to scare them away. But it was comforting to be in the Bob Marly! The black bear was very cute. He or she was a juvenile; larger than a little cub but did not look to be a yearling. Hey but what do I know about the age of a bear! Anyway he or she was quite afraid of us and after pausing to look at us, ran from us at breakneck speed. I can say from experience that a bear running away from you is better than one running toward you!

Aspens........ Until living here I was not always so impressed by the aspen tree. But seeing them in every season and learning about them, I have come to love them. Unlike most deciduous trees they are interconnected by a root system that spreads out and creates other aspens by sending out shoots. This helps them to survive and continue on. Even after a fire, due to the fact that the root system survives the heat, aspen colonies will reappear with the roots sending forth more shoots. They can be fragile as individuals subject to disease and other ailments causing the one tree to die but because of its connection to the root system, others will take its place continuing on the colony.......Are we not in the kingdom of Heaven called to be sort of the same? "Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others." Romans 12:4-5

Aspens are tender green in the spring with a green that defies description. The white trunks with their dark spots called eyes due to their shape reflect the sun when they are hit by its light in all seasons. Their leaves quake in the wind sounding like little fairy hands clapping. In the Fall they turn either a bright yellow-gold or a peachy orange depending on the species; their Fall beauty takes my breath away. Should not the Kingdom of Heaven do the same in the midst of a world in turmoil; our every breath, our every season, our every sound calling out to the world, "come home, come to the One who offers peace that transcends all understanding?"

So as I sit in the midst of the aspens, or sometimes I even lie down among them looking through their leaves heavenward, my prayer is that I can be a citizen of hope and peace in the middle of the Kingdom of Heaven.

By the river.......We had a church retreat this weekend just around the corner from our Marble Community Church at Treasure Mountain Bible Camp. The first day was making the 13,552 summit of Treasure Mountain with three other church members. It was exhilarating to say the least! It was something that I was deeply grateful that I was able to do. I do not take these things for granted with all the things that I have experienced with my head! God's world is magnificent and I am so grateful that I can SEE it.

On the second day of the retreat I taught the women's session and one of the scriptures that we looked at was Mary, the sister of Martha and Lazareth sitting at the feet of Jesus listening to His words, His teachings, learning from the Master. I encouraged the ladies to have a time of reflection somewhere quiet in the camp. I went to sit by Yule Creek, listening to it as it ran across the rocks creating nature's music. With the procedure I am having this week and with some of the sorrow that friends and family of mine are facing, I had a lot in my heart. But I sat still by the creek and opened my heart to Jesus and felt the sun on my face as if it was God Himself warming me with His love. Off to the right I caught a glimpse of wild raspberries. There were only a few left. I reached for them, picked them and popped them in my mouth! I was amazed that there were just those few left. It is a little late in the season for them.........Then I heard the Still Small Voice, "I am your portion, child." and I knew and I know that He is my "all in all."

"Martha, Martha you are worried and upset about many things but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better (or the better portion as some scholars say) and it will not be taken from her." Luke 10:41-42. .....We are blessed for we face nothing alone. He is our portion.

I saw the neurosurgeon. The news was better than expected. I only have two small brain tumors instead of three. They were concerned that the one in the front of my head in a place called the olfactory groove might reach the optic nerve or the optic chiasm of my left eye which is the only eye that I have vision in. But the optic nerve and the chiasm look clear of the tumor. The doc recommended that I get that tumor taken care of through a procedure called gamma knife which is a type of radiation. He said that it was not an emergency and that we could watch the tumor for a year.

I took a couple of days to pray about it. One morning sitting out in the back of my brother-in-law's yard with my dog Starbuck and a venti cup of Starbuck coffee looking at the mountain called Pike's Peak, I just felt this strong inner urge that I should get it out. It was the cool of the day. It was just God, me, my dog and a cup of morning coffee. I felt a peace that this is the direction I should take. So on the 9th of September, I will have the gamma knife procedure in Denver. Prayers are appreciated. I rely upon the prayers of God's people.

Sunday in our historical Marble Church......today was a very sweet service for me as a pastor's wife here in our mountain village of Marble. As a chaplain's wife in the Air Force I have had the privilege to love many Air Force parishioners and to have them love me enough to pray for me, with me, and over me through some very serious health issues. By God's grace and the prayers of His people I was brought through those times.
Here in our small historical church in Marble I have the privilege of loving our parishioners and today felt their love in a powerful way..........

As many of you know, I have had 5 benign brain tumors in which one of them took the vision in my right eye. They were all successfully removed and I survived it all by the grace of our almighty God! Recently I found out that I have developed a brain tumor that is in a spot that could endanger the vision in my left eye. I go to the neurosurgeon this week to determine what is the best course of action to treat this tumor and save my vision.
Today, the parishioners led by one of the men of the church, laid hands on me and prayed for healing, guidance, and direction. It was a surprise to me and touched me deeply. It was as if Jesus, through His people, reminded me that I am not alone. I go with the confidence that once again I am held before the throne of grace by the prayers of the "saints!"
The service ended at the altar with communion following the sermon on "crumbs from the Master's table". O how sweet are even the crumbs from our Lord's table.